Lagosians are a fascinating bunch.
Why won’t they be? I mean, about half of Nigeria’s Internally Generated Revenue (IGR) comes from that state.
Apparently, they have 9 lives too.
Or how else do you explain the sheer number of people who cross expressways, right under pedestrian bridges?
And no, I’m not talking about uneducated, dirty, or physically-challenged people.
I’m talking well-informed sprii-sprii-speaking dressed-to-the-nines ladies and gentlemen—racing like 100m dash sprinters on a hot afternoon—right under a pedestrian bridge.
And the drivers—who for some reason think themselves F1 racing professionals—will not slow down when they see you crossing.
In fact, they’ll often accelerate the more, as if to let you know that your village people are about to finally finish you pata pata.
Makes me wonder if it’s some sort of adrenaline rush game—a Russian roulette of some sorts where if you survive, you live to tell the tale and if you delete, then you’re weak and nature has taken its course.
But seriously, what shall it profit a man to cross an expressway under a pedestrian bridge and join his ancestors prematurely?
The matter taya us, so we asked some people.
We’re Avoiding Hoodlums
Funke you’re lying jo. Are we a joke to you? That your excuse would have worked if we’re talking about using the bridge at 9pm when the whole place is deserted. But no be you been cross the bridge this afternoon? Were there thieves lying in wait on the bridge to waylay you at 1pm this afternoon?
In reality, the reason why most Lagosians avoid using the pedestrian bridge is because they’re in too much of a hurry and ascending and descending the bridge will ‘waste their time.’
So full-grown adults—people’s fathers and mothers will put their lives on the line—at the mercy of danfos and trucks with break-and-quench braking systems, just because they cannot spare 3 minutes to cross a pedestrian bridge.
What’s more fascinating is that time and again, people keep getting run over.
At some point, Lagos state Government put officers at strategic locations—some of whom are in plain clothes.
And some of these officers would be the ones to goad you into crossing the roads.
They’d also be the ones to aggressively grab you by the scruff of the neck and throw you into a ‘Black Maria.’
A mobile court will judge your case in minutes and—bless your soul if you have no money to bail yourself and no one to call on.
That Kirikiri that you’ve been hearing about, you’ll enjoy it, including its famed koko beans.
The next time you’re tempted to cross a major expressway, right under a pedestrian bridge, ask yourself these questions:
‘Do I really want to be unfortunate?’
‘Do I have 9 nine lives?’
‘Do I want to use my own hand and do myself?’
‘Do I have enough money for my own burial?’
If your answer to all these are yes, then feel free to say your goodbyes at home before crossing.
But if not, Ogbeni respect yourself and use the pedestrian bridge.
Nonsense and ingredients.
